Saturday, April 10, 2010
I've had it with you!
I hate you and believe me I do not use these words lightly... but I cannot remember anything good that came out of you ever since you invaded my body about 10 years ago.
There is nothing I enjoy about you! Nothing!
You want to know why?
Because I have tried anything and everything with you... I tried to sweat you out on the treadmill, worked out with scary tattoo freaks in smelly gyms, you did not care how high my heart rate rose by climbing up seriously steep hills on the elliptical trainer, how much I sweated, how many muscles I built and most of all... you did not care how much I starved.
To make matters worse all you ever gave me was a nasty attitude.
Yes, you heard me... you have a bad freaking attitude! You ignored all my attempts to purge you and instead of shrinking or relocating I heard you giggling in my thighs!
I know that from a medical point of view I need some of you... SOME... and somehow you must have missed that part!
If I ever find out which one of you little jerks decided that it is okay to invite all your friends to party within my body there will be serious trouble.
You are lucky that you are small in size, otherwise I would just crush you and rid you out one by one... but your day will come... make no mistake about it.... I will continue my journey with the help of "Your Highness" and you will have no choice but to shrink... Sooner or later I will pee out your "soul" and you will for eternity rod within the Los Angeles canalization system and never ever have the chance to make anyone's life as miserable as you made mine.
This is not a threat! This is a promise!
Consider this letter to be your permanent eviction notice. I've had it with you!